Category: Let's talk
Given the recent topic posted regarding wedding rings, and should we ware them always. Another question has come to mind. In the case of an engagement ring, what is the right thing to do if you and your fiance brake up. Does the guy have the right to ask for the ring back? Should the girl autimaticly give it back to him? or is it hers for everr the minute he slips it on her finger. If that is the case, then is it right for her to continue waring it when the relationship is all over? I mean, I personally would have difficulty explaining to my currant partner that this is the engagement ring that mister so and so before you gave me. I deffinetly think that in the case of a divorce, or marage seperation that she should keep both wedding and engagement ring, but if the relationship goes bad before the wedding day? Then I would be trying to give it back to him. Of course then the question of what should he do with it now arises, and I certainly wouldn't be suggesting keeping it for your next fiance, cause if she ever found out, it would be over faster than you could believe *grin*
OK I have seen things like that. I was told if the girl breaks it off, then she has to return the ring. But if the guy does it then it is her's to do what she wants with it. The ring is like signing a contract. Not sure what I would do.
Judge Judy says the girl must always give the ring back if they don’t marry LOL
i'd tend to look at it this way. if i gave anybody a gift i'd never expect that gift back. the moment i had handed it over it would then become that persons property to do with as they wished. besides, just because you keep an engagement ring doesn't automatically mean that it has to be warn on the same finger. if you war it on another finger it would just be another ring that you owned, like any other.
in short, it's the woman's ring, so the woman should do what she wishes with it.
I would, and have, at least offer to give it back regardless of whether it was me or the guy who called things off. But I agree that after marriage, the woman gets to keep wedding and engagement rings in case of a divorce.
That's actually happened to me. I was engaged once. I had the ring and everything. Well, thankfully *he turned out to be a real asshole* we broke it off. It was his fault, but I ended the relationship. I wanted nothing to do with the ring. I didn't want to hold on to it. Maybe it was because it was a bad experience. I don't know. Anyway, and he needed the money. So I gave it back to him.
Once you give a ring (or any gift) it is the person's property and you have no say over how that person chooses to dispose of it (or use it) so I agree with Harp on this. The woman has to decide what she wants to do with the ring or any other gift. If I got an engagement or wedding ring back I wouldn't keep it, I'd pawn it off for money possibly or keep it as a reminder of that relationship but I'd never use it or give it to someone else (sorry the word keep was a bit misleading above, I mean I'd never use it in any capacity other than to remind me of the good times I had with that person). Of course in the ideal world you never have to worry about it since it's one happy engagement follows by a happy marriage right ;) too bad we don't really live in the ideal world *smiles* but I think such commitment, even engagement, should be taken very very seriously and you need very convincing and strong reasons for breaking that off.
Cheers
-B
I had a similar experience Squirrel,I sold the damned thing and gave the money to one of the charities I support.
Interesting question Puggle. I'm not quite sure what I'd do, but if the guy really was in debt, then eh shoudln't have given the rign to emint he first place. When I get engaged, I don't want a three milliond ollar ring, I'd be happy with a three hundred dollar or les one. It's pe person I love, not the metal on my hand.
well i have bin engaged twice. i gave the ring back to my first partner. although when it came to the second partner i kept the ring and wear it on the oposit hand so no one i none the wiser.
I would have to agree with my man on this one. I was engaged as most of you already know. And we are still best friends, so of course I still wear the ring! on my left hand, obviously! As long as your partner has no issues with youwearing it, and I don't see why they would! I don't see anything wrong with that. To be engaged to someone you have to really care for them, and how can that go away just like that. I know there are different situations, but you still cared enough for them to get the ring in the first place. I myself would give the ring back beforeI would pawn it or something. that's just me though! I would feel abad knowing how much that ring ment at the time it was baught! Call me sentamental,but that's my take on it!
well i wouldn't ask for it back, that's for them to offer or what ever. even if they did i doubt i'd accept it, i'd probably tell them to do with it what they will.. don't really know what to say to this really if am honest.
i wouldn't give it back even if they give me money in exchange of that ring.
a gift is a gift, so if an engagement was broken off, it's the girl's right to choose what she does with it. i personally wouldn't keep it, i'd rather sell it to a pond shop or something.
keeop it
I don't think there's any obligation to give it back, but I think I would anyway. Especially if I was the one to break it off. Don't know why that would make a difference, but it seems to. Maybe because the ring is an extra economic commitment he's made to the engagement, and if I broke the contract, I would forfeit the right to the ring, which is a symbol of his commitment. That's a horrible clynical way of looking at it, but I think there is some sort of imbalance there, depending on who ends it.
I think it depends on the situation. A gift is a gift, and never given back, but if it ended badly, or I ended it, or I just couldn't bare to keep it, but couldn't sell it either, I'd give it back. I'd keep it if it was just a good relationship that for whatever reason couldn't work out, as a memory of good things, I don't think I'd ever wear it. The ring was a symbol of something that ended, it would be like trying to hold on to something that isn't there. But if the guy's a real asshole, then pawn the damn thing! Like I said it really depends on the situation
Well I wear five or six cool rings on my hands, but if and when it came to the time when the relationship finished between my partner, Fiancae or Husband, I wouldn't give the ring back unless he asked for it back. it would seem very ugreatful since he probably lost a lot of money and went to a lot of trouble to acquire it for me. I'd just lock it away or even bury it, say goodbye to the memories and everything.
It's a bit complicated to know what to do with the rings.
the first one I got, I took back and got a pearl necklace.
the second I still have, and put in back on in hopes that things will last this time.